Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 44.2 – PART TWO (A show of 2 halves.)

“We all seem that way, even if we’re not but secretly are.”

It’s time for the MBR Xmas Crustmas Banana Bonanza! Not that it’s any different from other episodes, though it does have a guest in the form of Mads Haarløv from Danish death dealers and sludge guzzlers UNDERGANG. He’s also Dave’s mate, and he brought beer. Speaking of which, a hearty shout out and thank you from all the MBR crew, to Magister Gene for the beer money. Nighest of swans! The show ran over, so was split into 2 halves, and at the end of each features some tracks from Dave’s upcoming projects as an Xmas bonus to our beloved listeners, as well as a bit of an explanation. So sit back, relax, stretch your sack, and check out the show. It goes downhill pretty fast. That will be the beer. On this Solstice shredding show you’ll be getting:

Confessions of joint nudity very early on.
The “Woop” count, updated.
Polite Danes making erotic advances to Dave, who apparently looked homeless.
Inadvertently summoning Finnish demons.
Packets of guilt left out in the rain.
Mads has art, and it’s a load of old wank.
Nostalgic cracker tales and Heavy Metal friends.
Passion fruit flavoured banana beer. And it’s utter bollocks.
Random Bludgeon Geography!
What do Welsh androids dream of?
Due to some fantastic editing skills, the ZZ top cover went down incredibly well. Until it didn’t.
Austrian bands from down under, mouths full of meatballs, and Muppet Satanists.
Nostalgia for OG Metal Breakfast, and a possible home invasion at Spenceley’s place.

Part 1 finale tracks:
Hellfrost & Fire – “Legion of Hellfrost and Fire” & “Black Secrets in the Splintering Walls”
Formaldehydist – “Piss-soaked Lingerie” & “Caught Between a Cock and a Flight Case”

Part 2 finale tracks:
Formaldehydist – “Chunder on the Tundra” & “Alcohol By Volume (Turn That Fucker Up)”
Hellfrost & Fire – “The Lost King and The Heir Apparent”


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 44.2 – PART ONE (A show of 2 halves.)

“We all seem that way, even if we’re not but secretly are.”

It’s time for the MBR Xmas Crustmas Banana Bonanza! Not that it’s any different from other episodes, though it does have a guest in the form of Mads Haarløv from Danish death dealers and sludge guzzlers UNDERGANG. He’s also Dave’s mate, and he brought beer. Speaking of which, a hearty shout out and thank you from all the MBR crew, to Magister Gene for the beer money. Nighest of swans! The show ran over, so was split into 2 halves, and at the end of each features some tracks from Dave’s upcoming projects as an Xmas bonus to our beloved listeners, as well as a bit of an explanation. So sit back, relax, stretch your sack, and check out the show. It goes downhill pretty fast. That will be the beer. On this Solstice shredding show you’ll be getting:

Confessions of joint nudity very early on.
The “Woop” count, updated.
Polite Danes making erotic advances to Dave, who apparently looked homeless.
Inadvertently summoning Finnish demons.
Packets of guilt left out in the rain.
Mads has art, and it’s a load of old wank.
Nostalgic cracker tales and Heavy Metal friends.
Passion fruit flavoured banana beer. And it’s utter bollocks.
Random Bludgeon Geography!
What do Welsh androids dream of?
Due to some fantastic editing skills, the ZZ top cover went down incredibly well. Until it didn’t.
Austrian bands from down under, mouths full of meatballs, and Muppet Satanists.
Nostalgia for OG Metal Breakfast, and a possible home invasion at Spenceley’s place.

Part 1 finale tracks:
Hellfrost & Fire – “Legion of Hellfrost and Fire” & “Black Secrets in the Splintering Walls”
Formaldehydist – “Piss-soaked Lingerie” & “Caught Between a Cock and a Flight Case”

Part 2 finale tracks:
Formaldehydist – “Chunder on the Tundra” & “Alcohol By Volume (Turn That Fucker Up)”
Hellfrost & Fire – “The Lost King and The Heir Apparent”


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 44.1

“Uh oh…”

In yet another eleventh hour episode recorded over a week ago (cough) with no beer involved (cough cough) and an awful lot of borrowed jokes (HACKing cough) Dave brings a plethora of piquant pieces to pleasure the perception. Alternatively, a bunch of songs that sound good. No Kent or Bob, sadly. The boys will be back in time for the Xmas Crustmas Banana Bonanza. Or something like that. This episode, however is almost a Halloween special, as seen by the colossally epic cover image. So raise a glass or twelve of something infernal. And please don’t disturb Dave on the 31st. New Doctor Who is on the telly.


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 44.0

“You’re never involved…”

Dave, Kent and Bob are on fine form in this all-new episode. Well, it sounds that way at least. It’s probably just the ale talking. Recorded early in 2021, so apologies for the delay. More bands run the gauntlet, more exterminations, more expletives, and a lot more beer and trips to the bathroom. Many thanks to Rob Turman, who sent us money to spend on beverages, and also on the Stygian Dark album mix. So if you think it sounds shit then blame him. He also sent in another song. Blame him for that, too. On this episode there are such tantalising titillations as:

Possible intercourse with Jean-Michelle Jarre.
When is an Iniquity album not an Iniquity album?
Asthmatic oral pleasures between March and May.
Lick your laptop in a B-movie frenzy.
JK Rowling’s rubbish book: Gordon Ramsey and the respectable Roe recipe.
A country mile, a baker’s dozen, and a short Stygian walk into a bar.
Bring forth Toyah Wilcox and the nipples!
Kent admits to holes in his musical upbringing. Or ball bag.
Do you have a moment to talk about brains?
Relating bollocks about past hosts.
Is it Canadian, or a stroke?
Nepotism: It rhymes with Benediction. Almost.
Revenge: Best served cold, with feta cheese and dressing.


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 43.9

“I am talking ‘ere!!”

This show was recorded in March (of this year, obviously) and we would very much like to give thanks to Rob Turman for the donation of beer money AND to the studio costs for Dave’s latest project, Stygian Dark. Speaking of Dave’s projects, he plays one that is over 23 years old that no one has ever heard. You can all shut your Desert Mouth, too. As for the request to keep things short, well it almost becomes the longest show ever. On this episode you can complain about:

Scandinavian credit cards.
Lars Ulrich, the famous Finnish plumber.
Dog-licked reading glasses.
Total Nepotism, and Pandora opens up her box. The slut.
We blame the American for previous PC-related violations.
Married With Children, starring Ted Bundy.
How many guitar WHOOOOPS did you count?
The tale of the buttery Spaniel.
Rob T: Thanks for the beer money! The song…not so much.
Dave admits he once sang like a girl. (Once??)
Bob is “don’t mention the war” years old.


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 43.8

“Ladies and Gentlemen…”

While we’re not celebrating it on this episode, this show actually marks MBR’s 13th anniversary, from back on April 1st. What we ARE celebrating here is a happy-ish New Year. Indeed, this show was recorded back in 2020 and was going to be the first episode for January 2021. But schedules are currently all wibbly-wobbly, so this one is here now. Better late than never. Though you may want to listen to it before agreeing to the previous sentence. On this show you’ll be getting and regretting:

2020: What a bag of shite.
The Corona calibration litmus test.
We hope Sweden is okay!
Dave’s overly loud glasses.
Blasphemy and willy-waving at Jesus.
Black black blackety-black blackened of the blackest blackened black metal.
Aural haemorrhoid cream.
More cheese on your NWOBHM, vicar…or would you prefer a foursome?
Bass guitar, or a bee in a toilet roll?
Black & white TVs are actually colour.
It has come to our attention that Bob’s favourite KISS album is probably “Unmasked.”


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 43.7

“Thanks for these virtual reality glasses…”

In yet another Eleventh Hour episode, Dave not only plays his pick of 2020 – and a couple from 2021 – but he also premiers a track (maybe two?) from his new project STYGIAN DARK. And there was much rejoicing.
Feel free to leave any feedback on the band and the show, at all the usual places. Or don’t. Just drink beer. That’s good too.


Metal Breakfast Radio – Episode 43.6

“Holy Moley, that’s a…”

A special show this time around, highlighting the brand new 2021 sampler from Transcending Obscurity Records. This is a label very close to Dave’s hearts, as several of his bands are signed to them. In fact, you can hear a track from his new project HELLFROST AND FIRE on the show – as well as another only for MBR listeners. Check out the rest of the awesome bands on the sampler, and go get it for yourself. It’s free, but throw some shekels towards the label if you can. Dave also gives a 30 second tease of his other new project STYGIAN DARK at the end of the show. So stop reading this and go and listen, you bellend!

Metal Breakfast Radio - Episode 43.6